( my seasons )

oh how i love that the seasons have changed and that fall is here.  this is my favorite time of year.  i, however, seem to be in a different season of life right now.  i know i'm pregnant, maybe that's it.  i'm in a funk right now and absolutely cannot seem to get on top of things. 

don't get me wrong, i love karsyn and just being a mom.  i love that i'm about to be a mom to two little girls.  my favorite man is my best friend.  he's super understanding, supportive, and involved.  but it seems as though i can't get past this monster called life right now - cooking.  cleaning.  laundry.  playing with karsyn.  groceries.  it seems as though the minute i get the dishes put away and a new load washing, karsyn has syrup fingers on the tv, spilled her "straw drink" as she calls it, and is trying to clean it up with her feety pajamas. 

these certainly are the most exhausting and hardest of my life, but, at the same time, i know most of you have also gone through this and come out alive.  and have done it more than once now.  sometimes i feel so defeated, so overwhelmed, so incapable, and like such a failure on every level of my "job".  the housework.  mothering.  cooking.  laundry.  quiet time.  money.  etc.  etc.  etc.

through all of these failures, there is a light that i do see that makes it all worth it.  my child knows she is loved.  she is healthy.  she laughs.  she explores and learns daily.  my husband knows i love him.  i am faithful to him.  we laugh together.  he's patient with me, just like the laundry is. 

if only i could just get ahead for one day.  so i pray that this season i am in moves on.  and soon.  i'm ready for the next season of my life, but i'm pretty sure i want fall to stick around for a while longer.

( did you? )

i'm not going to get all political here ... well, because that's just not me, BUT ...

did you?

( we are alive indeed )

karsyn and i spend all last week at my parent's house in san antonio so i could nurse my back and get some rest.  karsyn was sick most of the time, but is doing better today.  my back is better as well, but i'm still taking it easy. 

it was a week well worth it.  my sister was there every day to help with karsyn and when the troops came home from work each day, she had plenty of play mates.  i so missed my favorite man though and we are so glad to be back at home. 

i've been feeling lots of pressure lately and some cramping, but i think everything is going good with the baby.  we're on the downhill slide of things, but not slowing down a bit.  football season is almost over, which brings on basketball.  i'm thrilled to attend my favorite man's games in air conditioning.  then it's all the holidays, karsyn's birthday, the new year, and a new baby.  hopefully in that order.

so it's back to life for me this week.  trying to get back to our so loved routine.

( sweet friend and the weekend )

here's a super cute picture of karsyn and her sweet friend, julie (aka ju ju).  she lives next door and is one month younger than karsyn.  they play all the time and fight like sisters.  as you can tell, they picked out their outfits for the day. 

on another note ... we had a not-so-exciting weekend, worth blogging about.  friday night, karsyn and i ventured to my favorite man's football game.  when we were leaving, i decided to be "fun mommy" and throw karsyn up in the air.  my back was already weak from sitting in uncomfortable bleachers, and when i caught her, i felt immediate pain.  so the rest of the weekend, i've been nursing a hurt back along with everything else.  hey, i never said i was smart.  i won't be doing it again though, that's for sure.

saturday, after i rolled myself out of bed and cried because it hurt, karsyn woke up with fever.  she's been sick ever since.  we did go to the doctor today and she has a viral infection and we basically have to let it run its course.  she's been miserable all weekend and it so sad to see her little face, red-eyes and all.  it was a perfect weekend for her to be sick though because when she doesn't feel good and has fever, she wants nothing more than for mommy to hold her.  all day.  which is all i could do anyways.

we were supposed to work the church nursery as well.  we had already rescheduled and then couldn't make it because of all of our ailments.  what a lazy weekend it was.  pray for our recovery.  my favorite man is probably ready to go back to work.  and i don't blame him.

( so thankful )

i have read/heard way to many stories lately of mom's going into labor or showing signs of early deliver around 25-26 weeks.  story after story after story comes to me of this same situation.  i'm starting to get a little worried here, but right now, at just over 25 weeks, me and baby are healthy.  i am just so thankful that the Lord has blessed me with overall healthy pregnancies (other than the always-heard-of pains and nausea). 

one story i just read is from today.  a mom in beaumont.  she already has a little girl about karsyn's age and is 26 weeks pregnant with her 2nd.  her baby is just fine, but her cervix is showing signs that she'll deliver soon.  she's going to women's hospital in houston to be on bedrest until the baby arrives.  they are hoping to hold out for 6 weeks.  what?!?!?!  SIX WEEKS of being in bed ... at a hospital ... without your other child that is at home?  i cannot imagine.

please pray for her.  she says she has a heavy heart right now just thinking about the next possible three months of being without her daughter every day.  she's relying on the Lord to carry her through this.  i cannot even come close to imagining me being in her situation.

although i did hurt my back this evening being stupid with my own child and will regret that for the rest of the weekend.  pray for my back.  being pregnant and throwing a 30 pound two year old in the air isn't smart.  what was i thinking?!? 

( a quilt giveaway )

i found this website today.  she's giving away a fabulous quilt she made herself.  go there and enter to win.  it's beautiful!  this picture is straight from her blog.  if you win, i get half.  :) 

( random )

this is a random update, but at least it's something, right?

*i had my 24 week appointment today.  everything was great.  the baby is measuring right on track and my iron went back up.  my next appointment is the sugar test for gestational diabetes.  i failed the first one with karsyn and had to take the long three hour test.  this time he told me i had to diet and exercise to prevent failing the first one.  so, no more sweets.  limit my fruit.  drink lots of water and walk 30 minutes a day.  after that, i'll start going every two weeks.  we're on the downhill slide now, folks.

*i was just watching "little people, big world" on tv and it struck a cord.  if my family was going to be on tv just once, much less a whole season or two or three, my house would be clean.  i just want to go find where they leave and clean for them.  holy cow.  the clutter.  hmmm ... i wonder if they'd pay me to come organize their house for them.  what an idea!  i love to clean and organize other people's spaces. 

*karsyn is nearing age 2.  i have said before that the terrible two's really refers to the two years between ages 1 and 3.  she's at prime time right now.  just trust me.  she is learning manners though and doing mighty fine at it.  she says "excuse me, excuse me" if someone is in her way.  and she does say "please" and "thank you" regularly.

*on cleaning my own house ... i'm not quite in the nesting phase of pregnancy yet, but i'm getting there.  i so badly want my house to be fresh and clean, but have no motivation to get it there myself.  i can get one room clean at a time, but i'm not real sure when the last time was that the whole house was clean in one day.  does that even happen?  is it even possible?

( friday night ... in )

tonight karsyn went to friday night out at our church.  david had a football game.  me?  i stayed home and worked on karsyn's baby book.  yes, i am about to have another child and i have yet to finish my first child's baby book.  the book from the first year of her life and she's about to turn two. 

so, snapfish, meet erin.  erin, snapfish. 

i spent two hours of my evening going through karsyn's baby book to figure out which pictures i needed prints of, uploading them to snapfish (thanks to AW), and ordering prints of them.  i generously ordered 122 prints and it was so easy.  they'll arrive at my house in just a few days.  so worth it.  and i got to take a trip down memory lane looking at pictures from the moment she was born to her first birthday.  my how she has grown. 

here are a few shots for your viewing pleasure.

 

my sweet karsyn, how fast you have grown and it melts my heart to think of you growing up even more. my heart has doubled since you came into my life and i thank God every day for blessing me with you. all my love every day.

xoxo

mommy

( spelling change )

i never officially announced that the baby's name will be spelled

mYkah reese.

at first i spelled it with an "i" instead of a "y".  so there you go.

( to do )

you know i'm a listmaker, so here's my list of things to do before the new baby arrives in january.  we have approximately 16 weeks if she actually arrives on her due date.  karsyn came two weeks early, so we're anxious to see when this one is born.

*get out newborn clothes, socks, bibs, burp cloths, and any other newborn gear

*order nursery bedding

*get dayna to decorate nursery too  :)

*get play yard from mother in law

*buy swing and teach karsyn that it's not for her

*wash newborn clothes

*get infant carrier out of attic

*organize baby closet and dresser

*decide what bottles i will use this time.  i dislike avent bottles.  we used those with karsyn and they seem to leak. i have little patience for leaky bottles when you have a screaming, hungry baby.

*decide on a double stroller.  is it necessary?  do i want a double jogging stroller?  will i use a jogging stroller enough for the price?  what about a sit and stand stroller?

*plan and execute karsyn's 2nd birthday in december

*try NOT to grow as huge as a hippo in the next 16 weeks.  i think i've gained 10 lbs so far.  ugh.  i feel as big as the side of a barn already.

( concentration )

( cool and crisp )

i saw this picture online this morning and it made me crave freshness. 

or maybe it was the cool, crisp morning air as karsyn and i made our visit to target.  when we came back inside after enjoying the air, i gasped.  the house was so musty compared to the outside air.  not so cool and crisp.  i opened windows quicker than ever before.  i wanted to let that freshness in.

isn't this a topic that should be blogged about in spring?  maybe that picture should be fall leaves.  whatever the picture is, i'm liking the morning weather these days.  cool and crisp. 

now to clean my house and bring the outside in before it gets hot and i have to close the windows to turn on the AC.  oh, how i love texas.

any ideas on how to make the inside as fresh as the outside?