oh how i love that the seasons have changed and that fall is here. this is my favorite time of year. i, however, seem to be in a different season of life right now. i know i'm pregnant, maybe that's it. i'm in a funk right now and absolutely cannot seem to get on top of things.
don't get me wrong, i love karsyn and just being a mom. i love that i'm about to be a mom to two little girls. my favorite man is my best friend. he's super understanding, supportive, and involved. but it seems as though i can't get past this monster called life right now - cooking. cleaning. laundry. playing with karsyn. groceries. it seems as though the minute i get the dishes put away and a new load washing, karsyn has syrup fingers on the tv, spilled her "straw drink" as she calls it, and is trying to clean it up with her feety pajamas.
these certainly are the most exhausting and hardest of my life, but, at the same time, i know most of you have also gone through this and come out alive. and have done it more than once now. sometimes i feel so defeated, so overwhelmed, so incapable, and like such a failure on every level of my "job". the housework. mothering. cooking. laundry. quiet time. money. etc. etc. etc.
through all of these failures, there is a light that i do see that makes it all worth it. my child knows she is loved. she is healthy. she laughs. she explores and learns daily. my husband knows i love him. i am faithful to him. we laugh together. he's patient with me, just like the laundry is.
if only i could just get ahead for one day. so i pray that this season i am in moves on. and soon. i'm ready for the next season of my life, but i'm pretty sure i want fall to stick around for a while longer.