yes, i know it's friday. but this little girl's name is tuesday and she's dying of cancer. the doctors have sent her home and her parents believe they'll only have their little girl a few more days. and in their grief and sorrow, they are clinging to the Lord.
please. please. please. pray.
pray for tuesday. (click to see their blog)
today was my official due date.
and thank you, Lord, that my sweet baby decided to come 3 weeks earlier. i cannot imagine still being pregnant today. holy cow.
just to think that 3 weeks ago, i could only see the top of my belly when i looked down. there were no feet that could be seen. today though, here's what i see. so much better than a big ole' belly.
she is such a good baby. she loves to be in this sling, which gives me two hands to do other things. she's content to just sit in her swing or her bouncy seat as well. just what i wanted!
and, she looks nothing like karsyn did when she was a baby. i'll have to get out comparison photos, but here's a quick one of mykah today.
lovin' my babies. they both rock my world.
ok, so there is a huge difference in a new mom and a new mom with a toddler. the sleep deprivation is taken to a whole new level. you aren't able to sleep during the day when your baby sleeps like you did with the first one, which can make for headaches and really, really long days.
sweet baby #2 has been the perfect baby. until this week. and she's still good, but something is different. something is wrong almost. she's fussy. she isn't sleeping well. she's gassy. and she seems to be in pain immediately after she eats and when i change her diaper. a totally different baby than i had the first week of her life. so i'm in debates on what i should do about it. the doctor is going to tell me to wait it out, but i really think i should switch her formula. we'll see what the conclusion is.
back to sleep. there has been none.
i woke up after an hour of sleep this morning and didn't want to get the day started. i was a little grumpy, you could say. i've been doing so good with little sleep until today. when i turned my computer on, the Lord opened my eyes and got my day going. for the most part.
i have a daily Bible verse that opens up and this is what it said ...
Matthew 24:42 "Therefore, STAY AWAKE, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming."
for whatever reason, this is how karsyn holds mykah. not sure the reasoning behind it. she asks me ... "mommy, i hold mykah a bit?" so cute. i'm so glad and extremely thankful that she has been such a wonderful big sister.
and it's only just begun.
it's been a long time. a long, long time. like, at least 6 months kind of long time. i almost forgot how much fun it is. see this girl ...
her absolute favorite thing to do is to play hide and seek. ok, remember i was pregnant? hide and seek and huge pregnant lady don't mix well. for the last 6 months (because i got huge right away), hide and seek just hasn't worked well. the only place i could truly hide was behind a door. it's the only thing that covered me and there's only so many doors. if i knelt down behind something, which usually didn't hide me either, i couldn't get up fast enough to run. if i did, i'd have to go sit down because i was out of breathe.
tonight was the night. my body feels great. although i haven't been released yet to workout or do any activity, we played hide and seek. and we played it good. karsyn was squeaking and squealing. i did get tired, but she kept me going.
still, i went for the door. it's too easy to hide behind. and i'm still out of shape.
i was so happy. she was so happy. i cannot believe how much i missed that.
right now...
* i know that it's 10:45pm, but I don't know what day it is.
* my oldest child finally fell asleep, after calling "mooooommmmy" 543 times.
* i think there's spit up in my hair again. it's definitely on my shirt and I think in my shirt. maybe i'll get a shower tonight.
* i'm surrounded by the overflowing mess of our day, but I'm dancing around it with mykah anyway (and hoping i don't trip over another lego).
* the dinner dishes are still on the counter, getting crustier by the hour, but they're easier to scrape clean that way, right?
* there's a nightly 11pm - 1 am party-in-bed with two of my favorite people - one very wide awake, one very much wishing he was asleep.
but right now? everything is perfect.
i feel like i have everything in the world right now. my favorite man and now my two favorite girls.
BUT, at the moment ...
i. really. want.
1. a haircut. it's been since before thanksgiving. i'm looking a little shaggy these days.
2. a pedicure. just because it feels good and every mommy needs pretty toes.
3. a new pair of jeans. my maternity jeans, i'm afraid, will fall to my ankles at any time. my pre-pregnacy jeans don't go past my thighs. i only want one pair though as i hope to lose weight soon. very soon! any suggestions on good jeans?
that's all.
oh karsyn. you are the best big sister anyone could ask for. you have been unbelievable this past week and you amaze me more and more every day. from the moment you saw mykah, you were in awe. you wanted to hold her right away and even asked her, "mykah, what you doing?"
you love to kiss her each morning when you wake up and each evening before you go to sleep. you like to rock her, feed her, cover her up, and change her diapers. all with a little help, of course, but you do an incredible job. i love to watch you with her and to listen to what you say to her. it makes my heart melt when you sing "twinkle, twinkle little star" and "ABC's" to her and she seems to enjoy it as well.
i'm seriously speechless at how you have handled a new baby in our house. mykah is so lucky to have such an amazing big sister! mommy and daddy are so proud of you!
xoxo
mommy
today mykah is 1 week old.
life is good. karsyn has been unbelievably awesome with the new addition. she tells mykah "hi" all day long. gives her night night kisses. laughs hysterically when mykah makes noises. and says "mykah silly". super cute.
mykah is a wonderful baby so far. she rarely fusses (with the exception of the last 2 days b/c of some constipation problems ... now solved). she loves her swing and her bouncy seat too. answer to lots of prayers!
here are a few quick shots of mykah at 1 week old.
as i look back on the last 9 months, my heart is full of emotions.
joy. pain. excitement. sadness. laughter. love. and even a little regret.
life simply moves too fast.
here was my baby just a few months into my pregnancy with mykah.
still a baby. she waddled still. had that baby fat, which is still lingering. spoke small words. just 18 months old.
and here she is now. running from me. has long legs. speaks sentences. she told me to be quiet the other day. that's another blog for another day. and has an imagination beyond my wildest dreams.
i must say this wasn't an easy pregnancy for me and the time that i regret is the time that i simply didn't feel good and was unable to play with her like i wanted to. i haven't been able to enjoy jumping on the trampoline with her, which is her favorite thing to do outside.
the love was there though and it was a love that goes beyond any words that i can express.
that was 6 months of my child's life that i can't have back. there are so many things i wanted to do with her in that time too. and i think as a young mother, i will never quite understand how short the time is with my children while they are still so small. but how thankful i am for the reminders of what a blessing each passage of life truly is.
the hugs i get. the kisses she sneaks in. and the "i wuv you mommy" that gets tossed about far outweighs the tantrums, "no" yelling, and simply not listening to me ... any day. and i wouldn't have it any other way.
squeeze them. love them. hold them. because it doesn't last long.
i have to add a word or two or a few sentences. "my girls". how weird is that to say? i'm loving every minute though.
i made it to 37 weeks and 2 days! thanks to my mom who came and made me walk a marathon friday afternoon.
mykah reese hill made her debut on saturday. january 10. at 12:59 pm. that made her baby #5291 that dr. gayle has delivered. he gave her a serial number. seriously.
back to baby. here's a few pictures, then i'll tell you the story.
that's me. in pain, but trying to smile. luckily i had my very own pillow. i go nowhere without it.
sweet mykah. just seconds after she was born.
big sister giving mykah kisses for the first time. she was so sweet and actually wanted to hold her immediately. and everyone else had to have karsyn's permission first.
my favorite one of the two fo them so far. can you imagine what's going on in karsyn's head?
mommy and baby.
sweet profile. she has karsyn's chin and super chubby cheeks.
daddy and baby.
so, i ended up in the hospital friday night at 10pm with contractions. again. this time was different though. not only did he tell me at my appointment that morning that he wouldn't send me home if i came in again, but i was also in even more pain than last time. luckily, my parents had come friday afternoon to stay the weekend and help out with karsyn. it worked out perfectly. i didn't have to worry one second about where karsyn was and what she was doing. and, since i didn't go into labor till the next morning, everyone was able to get a good night's sleep.
i had been having contractions every 3-4 minutes this time. we drove to the hospital. they checked me. nothing. nothing had changed since my appointment that morning. "3 cm. 80%" the nurse said.
so an iv and pain pills and yet another overnight visit. dr. gayle would come in saturday morning at 8am though to break my water. i was indeed contracting every 3 minutes all night long, so i was just slowing making my way to being in active labor.
8 am saturday. doc came in to break my water. 10am got the epidural. 12:59 she arrived.
it all happened so fast and the epidural wasn't quite as effective this time as it was with karsyn. i pretty much felt everything i didn't want to feel. at the same time, it happened so fast, the pain came and went almost before i even realized. of course, i knew i was in pain though.
7 lbs. 13 oz. 19 1/2 inches. and she has brown hair and (i think) brown eyes. everyone has their opinion about that. it does have a blue tint, but not enough to say she's "blue eyed". and definitely not as blue as karsyn's.
she's beautiful. of course. and i'm proud to call her mine.
we had to stay in the hospital until monday because of some jaundice issues, but we are both healthy and doing wonderful. glad to be home and to enjoy the addition to our family.
for now. soon there will be 4. as you can tell from my GINORMOUS belly. holy cow. i didn't realize how big i am. my sweet friend, jasey, took these pictures for us while she was visiting.
what a whirlwind these past few weeks have been. christmas came and went so fast. it's almost surreal. it doesn't seem like that time of year. not only because of the weather either. i guess it's because of my pregnancy. i just didn't get into the season this time around.
the day after christmas, our favorite friends from oklahoma came to visit. they went with us to pick up our new-to-us car the day after they arrived and spent the whole next week with us as well. all i can say is ...
so. much. fun.
they have a 15 month old son who is absolutely adorable. him and karsyn played so well together. like a brother and sister would. almost. they enjoyed throwing blocks at each other and playing with karsyn's kitchen. it was so neat to see them interact.
their visit went by too quickly and i kind of ruined the moment for us by going to the hospital. after a busy, fun weekend, i spent monday, tuesday, and wednesday in the hospital with preterm labor. really thought i was going to be not-pregnant after that. didn't happen. i ended up on bedrest for the remainder of their visit, only to be back in the hospital the day after they left. not to have a baby again.
other than the hospital stay, we had tons of fun. visiting. while i was in the recliner. jasey is super organized and a go-getter, so my whole house was organized when she left. she finished up what i hadn't got to in mykah's room. rearranged and organized karsyn's room. and tons more.
james. what a guy. the first day i was in the hospital he stayed home with both kids. amazing. he did such a great job and was probably not thanked quite enough. his brain was probably fried. his body tired. but he did it. and didn't complain.
so although i took no pictures that week. had no baby that week. we have friends that rock our world!
