. he's here .

and he's perfectly perfect.

jaxton parker hill.
born at 35 weeks.
september 21, 2012.
7:02 am.
6 pounds 5 ounces.
18 3/4 inches.
perfect.

. 241/365 .

 

this morning was different.  much different than yesterday.  i'm still surprised.  she was very eager to get up and get going again.  ate.  did the whole routine.  she had known for several days what she wanted to wear for the second day.  her sparkly shirt.  sparkly belt.  and sparkly shoes.  and she had to tuck her shirt in she said.  oh, and the side pony tail, which somehow ended up just looking like a pony tail in the back that i didn't get centered.  oh well. 

 

she wanted pizza in her lunchbox today.  and milk.  and was ready with 30 minutes to spare. 

 

the hard part came when it was time for her to be dropped off.  today she insisted that i drop her off.  you know, she wanted me to do that yesterday because she "knew where her classroom was already."  i had to explain that mama didn't know where it was, so maybe she could show me.  that's how i got my foot in the door yesterday.  today though.  drop me off.  and i was ok with that.  parking and walking isn't really my favorite thing to do these days with the big belly and swollen feet.  but i would have walked her in every day if that's what she wanted. 

 

but, she wanted to be dropped off.  so we did just that.  as soon as that car door closed and i watched her walk away into the school all by herself, i lost it.  completely.  and have cried for an hour afterwards.  big, ugly tears.  i'll never lose that picture of her walking in from my head.  she had her backpack on.  lunchbox in hand.  opened the door and walked right in.  without me. 

 

and now i want to know.  since when did they start teaching them to be teenagers on the first day of kindergarten?!?  today was hard on this mama!  my mom said it best.  she called me shortly after and i boo hoo-ed to her.  she reminded me that i have raised her to be independent.  i have raised her for this very moment.  i have raised her to be strong and courageous.  i just didn't prepare myself to see that moment. 

 

 

. first day report .

i wondered all day how she would be when i picked her up this afternoon.  would she be quiet?  she tends to not want to talk about things unless it's on her terms.  i brought her some orange juice and chocolate chip cookies because i knew she'd be hungry.  she had a bag of goodies from her teacher that she eagerly showed mykah.  and she said "it was good!"  she told us that she went to art and that the little girl that sits next to her, mary hellen, followed her around all day long.  she talked about that several times and even brought up once that she "tried to get away from her."  i kind of chuckled, but tried to explain to her about being a leader and that maybe mary hellen was scared and saw that karsyn wasn't scared so she wanted to be with her and be her friend. 

she said they got to go on the playground twice and that she did everything by herself all day.  i had several talks with her prior about it being okay to ask for help.  she's VERY independent.  always has been.  and even if she can't do something, she won't ask for help.  so i wanted to make sure she knew that it was ok to do so.  she was very proud to announce that she was able to open her water and her chips all by herself at lunchtime. 

seems like a successful day to me.  and she's more than ready to go back tomorrow.  she was hyper all evening and didn't fall asleep as quickly as i had imagined.  my favorite part was when she came to me not too long after we got home and said "i just want to spend time with you mama."  so we did just that. 

. 240/365 .

. kindergarten 2012 .

today was the day.  the first day my baby went to kindergarten.  today wasn't as hard as i expected.  i cried throughout the preparation of it all, but when it came down to taking her, i was okay.  i cried when david left for work.  he cried when he got in his car.  it didn't help that karsyn was being sassy and saying "i'm going to kindergarten and you're gonna cry!!!"  it's like a dagger to the heart!  we got up early and david had already gone to chick-fil-a for a special first day of school breakfast. 

she was so excited though that the day had finally come.  she did her countdown daily.  told everyone she saw.  picked out her clothes.  and was on cloud 9 for several days leading up to it.  we did have lots of talks because she seemed so anxious about it all.  she is very detail oriented, so she needed to know everything that would happen in advance.

mykah was super excited for sissy as well.  at first anyways.  notice the shirt she picked out to wear today?  big sister in charge.  she took that title and ran with it all day long.  she about sent me into labor by the days end.  seriously.  can you blame her though?  she has NEVER had time alone with just mama.  and she took full advantage. 

she was ready to go quite early.  i'm very thankful that i don't have to drop her off until 8:10.  that will give us plenty of time in the mornings.  she gets up and at 'em though.  she was ready with LOTS of time to spare, which left lots of time for mama to think about the coming events. 

she has insisted all along that she takes her lunch every day as well.  it didn't matter to me either way, so we talked about it lots and she knew what she wanted.  today we packed a ham, cheese, & mayo sandwich, a bag of sun chips, applesauce, a cheesestick, and a gogurt thing.  along with a bottle of water.  i did not include the cooked broccoli that she asked for only because i have to figure out how to pack it to stay warm.  seems like i packed a ton of food too though, but i knew she'd be hungry!

 

right as we got to school, one of karsyn's sweet friends met us at the door.  they aren't in the same class, but her class is right by karsyn's.  i think walking with them helped for sure!  i almost lost it a few times, but was able to hold it together until mykah and i got back in the car.

 

 

and leave it to her.  she walked right in.  emptied her backpack of the last few school supplies she needed.  hung it up.  put her lunchbox where it went.  and strolled right to her desk and started playing with playdoh that the teacher had set out for each kid.  like a pro.  i was VERY thankful for how she did.  i was very unsure and very nervous about how she'd do.  lots of times she quickly returns to me and clings for a while until i bribe her to let go.  nope.  not this time.  she turned teenager on me in a matter of seconds.

 

 

i knew i wanted to make my departure short and sweet.  mainly for myself.  she was a little quiet, but said goodbye and sent us on our way.  honestly, i was shocked that it went so smoothly.  but thankful at the same time.  she's so big!!